do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
