I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Randomize
