i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
