Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(314): View more from Missouri

I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.

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(905): View more from Toronto

In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience

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(417): View more from Missouri

when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.

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(540): View more from Virginia

I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger

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(816): View more from Missouri

Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.

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(905): View more from Ontario

I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.

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(714): View more from California

He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.

(1-714): View more from California

That is my stoner wet dream!

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(509): View more from Washington

Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.

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