so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
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