and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
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