Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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