Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
