and you said cock pushups were impossible
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
