I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
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