do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize