Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
