you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize