it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
you win again, gameday.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
