i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Randomize
