Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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