My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
