the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
