Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
