yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
