sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
You ruined the universe
My feet surprised me
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
