I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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