You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
