hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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