Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
