if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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