There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
