You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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