So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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