I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
