Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
