Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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