ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
