Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
