I feel like abortions should bother me more
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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