its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize