I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
