ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
