Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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