If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
