They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
