ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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