i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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