remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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