We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
