He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
