Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
