i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
