I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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