I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
