I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
