You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
