In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
How external is "for external use only"?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
